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Rising On Your Own Self-Love and Instincts and Going All the Way

February 1, 2012 by admin  
Filed under Purpose and Passion

When you reach toward a dream, you reach toward your highest self-love.

That means you leave “the one who can’t do it” behind. They won’t let you take your delusions on the rocket ship anymore. This is a path of shaking off the shackles, the status quo, the old sad stories about what you don’t have or can’t do and rising on your own self-love and instincts. Your magnificence knows no limits, so you will need to shed every single one of yours. It’s a magical, messy, sacred transformation, if you ask me. Still, the glimpse of something more will impel you to trust in something more. And you will say yes, while everything small within you begs for a rain check.

But you will say yes, because everything sane within you will not allow you to take a rain check on your life.

I wrote my first book This Time I Dance! Creating the Work you Love, when I left the practice of law. I wrote about the challenges of leaving my career, but also about leaving behind all the beliefs that had led me to that inappropriate career. Finding my passion was an “undoing” process, more than a “doing” process. As an attorney, I felt as though there were bits of glass in my body. Metaphorically, it ached to move. Every one of those pieces of broken glass was a sharp cruel belief about myself or about making it in this world. You’re not normal. You’re an unrealistic wishful thinker. You need to grow up. You can’t make a living doing what you love. You need to be really talented and connected to get somewhere in this world, and you don’t have it. Each one of these beliefs restrained and stung me any time I dared to take a step towards my true potential. I had to learn how to replace these negative “realistic” beliefs with soft, illuminating, and empowering ones. That’s how I found my purpose and passion. I titled my book This Time I Dance! because I wanted to move freely. I wanted to move wildly. I wanted liberation. I needed to unroot every sad thought that ever held me back. I needed to dance with abandon and self-love.

I’m about to put out a new book Inspired and Unstoppable: Wildly Succeeding in Your Life’s Work! into the world. I am feeling wobbly again. The tasks of “launching” loom large, the territory seems foreboding, and I feel weak in the knees. All my old insecurities are coming up to the surface, marching over to the bar and ordering drinks, hobnobbing with the woeful ones and complainers, and ordering appetizers on my tab. I used to think that experiencing my old insecurities again was a sign of failure. Now I know it’s progress. I am moving towards new abundance, and every part of myself that is ready to be healed is surfacing. It’s a time to once again let go of deceptive limitations. This is a sacred time.

A Course in Miracles teaches that it’s not our mission to seek for love or goodness. Instead, we seek to “remove the blocks to the awareness of love’s presence.” We are not here to figure out better strategies for getting what we want. We are not here to make ourselves be brave or competent or talented. We are here to let go of the blocks that are in the way of all that we already are. We are here to love ourselves. We are here to let go of all our dark misunderstandings so that our true power takes center stage. Our false beliefs lie dormant when we hang out in the familiar. They only rush to the surface when we approach more promise.

If you are moving toward your dreams, this is the time to increase your dedication to self-love. Become a warrior and a devotee to your own alignment. This is no time to judge or demean yourself. Do not take one casual sip of poison. There is a creation in you like no other. Something beautiful wants to use your hands, your feet, your tongue, and the hours you have left on this earth. You will never regret having been honest with yourself, true to yourself, and silencing the jadedness within you. Be a cheerleader for the team you really want to play for. Be a nest and a cradle for something new and beautiful on this planet, and for the flight of your lifetime.

I am learning again to champion myself. It’s been my lesson to learn all along. I asked a friend of mine the other day, “If you could heal one thing in me what would it be?” He said, without missing a beat. “Stop telling yourself you don’t know what you’re doing.” He paused. “You know what you’re doing.” I felt his words soothe my bones, and fill in the pock marks and cracks of broken places. I felt myself at every age standing in line waiting to receive this benediction. His fatherly voice, part priest, part lion tamer, part rich Riviera sunlight sealed something within me forevermore. “You know what you’re doing,” he said. And it was done. I was blessed. I would stop denying my Light, and the inevitable grace of following where it led.

I had always thought it wise to doubt myself. I had always thought I was playing it safe by assuming I’d better get some other opinions, some better, safer opinions. “I don’t know what I’m doing.” I said it all the time. It had become a mantra of mine, a dark prayer, a jingle of damnation. I said it while looking in all directions. I said it while hoping to be rescued. I said it and slipped into my old stained coat of feeling helpless in the rain. I said it so that I didn’t ever have to make a mistake. I said it preemptively so that if I did make a mistake, I might be absolved. It sounded crazy now, big splotchy child-like logic, like don’t step on the cracks in the sidewalk and break your mother’s back.

So this is one of many beliefs I’m healing again, as I move forward. I am learning to champion myself again at new levels. I am holding my own hand in the rain. “I know what I’m doing,” I whisper to myself. It’s okay to be frightened. I am walking into new territory. I am walking forward with awe and curiosity and a great appreciation for myself for being on this journey and taking these steps. I am not listening to cruelty or urgency or self-negation of any kind. I’m not picking up hitchhikers that aren’t going in my true direction. I’m removing the glass shards again from my body one by one. I am letting go of the blocks to the awareness of love’s presence. I am letting of everything that is not loving and does not support my destiny. I am trusting in something more astounding than I can yet imagine. This time I dance, again.

Copyright © Tama Kieves  All rights reserved.

Tama J. Kieves is the bestselling author of THIS TIME I DANCE! Creating the Work You Love (How One Harvard Lawyer Left It All to Have It All!) and is a sought-after speaker and career coach who has helped thousands world-wide to discover and live their true work in the world. Visit her at www.ThisTimeIDance and sign up for free inspiration and support through her monthly e-newsletter or download her Free Transformational Report on “Finding Your Calling Now.”

Julian Kalmar and Rick Beneteau want to know if you've got what it takes to step up and be a leader in the new world transformation. CLICK HERE to find out.

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